This is an old passage I found in a journal that describes precisely my feelings at present:
Making Art? April 3, 2010
Does my art need to tell a story? Evoke an emotion? Can it just be movement to music? Can art just be a pretty picture? In my art/dance I want to travel to a new world, my world... does that mean everything has to be different? How do I show what I see or how I feel?
Creative pressure can make you freeze.
Maybe this is the suffering artist: You can go days without inspiration, your mind is in a barren desert and you carelessly count the tumbleweeds as you wait for a drop of water. But when the water comes it isn't rain but a tidal wave of millions of un-thought thoughts that come so suddenly, so quickly, you miss them all together. When the waves subside you find yourself waiting in that very same desert. You are left wondering if you are even an artist at all. At once everything seemed so important, so pressing and imminent, and suddenly... Nothing.